I found myself thinking about an internet friend that blocked me. More so because she didn't block me fully, so I helped her by making sure I wasn't following her on other platforms. She was going through a tough case and it happened when I just didn't see her messages anymore. It's cool though. I get how us as people want an explanation until we are blue in the face, but this I could understand. Something was being shedded and I have found myself with the familiar feeling to have some people simply not have access to the process. You present yourself in one way and you get hit with the acquired knowledge that lets you know that whatever that held truth in an instant doesn't apply to your way of living anymore.
I have accumulated a practice for myself to identify what can help me on a daily basis because of the amount of anxiety I have experienced. I don't wish my upbringing on anyone, but I'm grateful for the most part the very intense moments of realizing my life is mine and that I have way more control than I realized is because I needed a tailored approach. A tailored, spiritual approach. This approach told me to slow my ass down. That is what inspired "SLWDWNBRD."
I took quite the hiatus from my plans of having more content. As usual, something needed my attention to further me along the necessities of life to sustain my inner world. The world may not stop for me, but I know that's something I can do for myself. I had to do the work whether it meant putting a name what has had a hold on me or naming a track that I've been harboring for months.
During my season in the red I was able to express the foundation of what I had at the time as my "initial sound"; which I'm still building on moving to the blue phase. What the hiatus showed me is that after trials and errors, I get to do things differently just for peace of mind. Not for the sake of peace. Or for the sake of just doing. I could easily talk about what all I had to walk away from to finally get here, but I just don't care about that now. I plan to not care even much more than I don't now. It's all falling apart as it should've because I'm shedding old habits and ways of thinking. I appreciate the women that helped me the last few months and for me having the courage to move forward in my tailored lane for myself before I turned 29 (pic of me on my 29th birthday after a morning swim).
FORWARD Instrumental on SoundCloud
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